Bri Becerra

Features Editor

Every Thursday morning, I wake up knowing exactly what will await me — the most scrumdiddlyumptious smoothie made by Knowlton Cafe. The Thursday smoothie, acai banana, is the most superior of the daily smoothies by far. Everyone has their own opinions about which Knowlton smoothie takes the crown, but I’m here to tell you exactly why my opinion is the only correct one.

The acai banana smoothie is the most adorable shade of purple, matching my pastel colored spring outfits. Let’s be real; we’ve all wanted to eat something simply because it’s an appealing hue, and I feel this way about purple foods. Not only is this smoothie easy on the eyes, but it also has a superior flavor profile. It’s sweet but not overpowering, and the acai absolutely shines through. As a lover of both acai bowls and bananas, this is a match made in heaven for me.

Being someone that can’t consume dairy — a usual affliction experienced by anyone who falls under the category of “hottie” — the substitution of coconut yogurt instead of regular yogurt makes this beverage even more delightful. In some of the other smoothies, it completely throws off the flavor. But acai banana is delectable for all kinds of smoothie consumers, especially those who are of the lactose-intolerant persuasion. 

I trudge through the worst of weather conditions every Thursday to use my dwindling flex dollars to purchase this smoothie, and I hope that I am not alone in my dedication to this acai banana masterpiece. I have never once had a class in Williams, but I nevertheless continue my intimate relationship with this smoothie regardless of its inconvenience to my daily whereabouts.

I pity those who favor a different Knowlton smoothie, as they do not get to experience the pure joy that comes from realizing that it is a Thursday. The Knowlton workers are doing the Lord’s work when they produce the artistry that is the acai banana smoothie.

The other smoothie flavors simply have nothing on the Thursday selection, falling short of being my most beloved treat. Monday’s peach mango is just okay, but it doesn’t scratch the smoothie itch in the same way as acai banana. Strawberry banana is a solid choice and receives extra points for being pink, but it’s not sweet enough. 

Berry pomegranate on Wednesday is a controversial beverage — the campus is split between loving it and hating it. I personally rank this smoothie as No. 2 in my lineup, with its only downfall being that the dark seeds get stuck in my teeth. Not the cutest look when I have a seed right in my chompers when I’m talking to a professor. Friday’s tropical smoothie simply is just not it, leaving me wanting more and wishing I could go back in time to get a Thursday smoothie instead.

The acai banana smoothie is the highlight of my week. If I could write love letters to this life-changing drink, I would. It is my hope that the rest of campus acknowledges the acai banana supremacy, thanking the Knowlton employees for blending up a masterpiece week after week. Next time you check your watch and it happens to be a Thursday, make sure to order an acai banana smoothie. If you see me in line, I’ll even buy it for you.