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Bissman RA relieved to be reassigned to actual den of lions

Silly Crashtest
Features Ice Queen

The stickiness of Bissman Hall’s beer and liquor stained stairwells and floors could not hold down another residential assistant (RA) to stay in the saturated Greek-life dorm. After months of anticipating slipping on vomit that sails past the trash cans in the chapter rooms, Bissman RA Happi Tuleeve ’19 is relieved to be reassigned to an actual den of lions for the remainder of the school year.

“I was really thankful ResLife listened to my concerns and actually did their job in assigning me to a different space that is considerably safer than Bissman. The claws of the lions I will be with are nothing compared to those of some of my sorority residents,” said Tuleeve.

Bissman, known for its constant influx of noise, cheap decorations and even cheaper alcohol, has a high turnover rate for RAs, much like that of first-years that visit the Wellness Center in the fall semester.

“Even though I feared for my life for most of my time at Bissman, I appreciate the challenges my residents created, like when I chased down a drunk senior for stealing a president’s paddle or the time I had to walk through a party themed ‘Rave Daughters and Disappointed Fathers,’” said Tuleeve

The lion’s den, which is located on University Street, houses 14 lions in a 50×50 ft den, with a 10×10 ft mound of dirt for the RA to rest on, a considerable increase in size from Tuleeve’s dorm in Bissman. Additionally, there is a strict no party policy at the den that includes a ban on sweatshirts with Greek letters, chants, glitter and Milwaukee’s Best beer.

“I can’t wait to not have to worry about new member education or the 15 different stereos blasting shitty music throughout that building; however, I will kind of miss the roaches. They never caused me trouble,” said Tuleeve. “I’m just really looking forward to building a community for these lions and let them know I offer a safe space in their den.”

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